The showdown Tuesday night – pitting a devotee of democracy who aspires to be our next president against a groupie of autocracy who aspires to be our last-ever president – was more delicious than an ice cream sundae with cherry on top.

Thanks to a shrewd performance by Kamala Harris, one that surely exceeded Democratic dreams, Donald Trump was reduced to the most imbecilic parody of himself. He was the neighborhood lunatic who wanders the street in his bathrobe screaming at trees.

Perhaps men are too emotional to be president.

If there’s any justice in this world – if a modicum of sanity still reigns in this country – this race should have ended once and for all when Trump was asked why he blocked a tough bill that would’ve put thousands of new agents and officers on the border

Instead of answering the question, he lost his mind: “Look at what’s happening to the towns all over the United States… A lot of towns don’t want to talk about it because they’re so embarrassed by it. In Springfield (Ohio), they’re eating the dogs! The people that came in. They’re eating the cats! They’re eating – they’re eating the pets of the people that live there!”

The guy is a poet. He is E. E. Cummings on acid:

They’re eating the dogs

They’re eating the cats

They’re eating

They’re eating the pets of the people

Given the dearth of evidence for that soliloquy, I have to wonder whether our “undecideds” would really consider putting this demented fool in charge of anything more taxing than a lemonade stand. Repeatedly, Harris put bait in the water and, repeatedly, he took it, like when she casually mentioned people leaving his rallies early out of boredom.

“People don’t leave my rallies!” Trump bellowed. Then he recycled one of his August delusions: “People don’t go to her rallies! There’s no reason to go! And the people that do go, she’s busing them in and paying them to be there!”

The terminal narcissist wasted precious time still insisting he won in 2020. When it was pointed out that he lost 60 court cases, he said they were all thrown out on “a technicality,” whereas those of us who were alive at the time well remember that judge after judge (including some Trump appointees) ruled that his lawyers had presented zero evidence of stolen or fraudulent votes.

“Donald Trump was fired by 81 million people. So let’s be clear about that,” said Harris, who eyed his string of rants with puckish bemusement. “And clearly, he is having a very difficult time processing that.”

It was also fun when Harris baited him about his global reputation, and he responded by saying Viktor Orban, the Prime Minister of Hungary said “the most respected most feared person is Donald Trump.”

Yes, his character reference was an autocrat who’s been systematically destroying democracy in Hungary. Harris nailed him for that too: “It is well known that he admires dictators, wants to be a dictator on day one according to himself…And it is absolutely well known that these dictators and autocrats are rooting for you to be president again because they’re so clear, they can manipulate you with flattery and favors.”

The old loon spilled so much blood, it’s a miracle he didn’t need IV fluids. Harris pounded him for repeatedly trying to sabotage Obamacare (he’s still hawking his non-existent health plan: “We’ll come up with something, we’re working on things”). She hammered him for his long racist track record, starting with his refusal in the 1970s to rent apartment units to Black families. When he recycled his standard lie that the crime rate is “through the roof” (the FBI says it’s going down), she twisted the stiletto: “This is so rich – coming from someone who has been prosecuted for national security crimes, economic crimes, election interference, has been found liable for sexual assault, and his next big court appearance is in November at his own criminal sentencing.”

And when he started to obsess (yet again) about President Biden, she gently reminded him: “You’re not running against Joe Biden, you’re running against me.”

One of her tasks last night was to sell herself to voters who are still getting to know her. While Trump as always stayed focused on himself, she spoke to the voters’ hopes and dreams, highlighting her plans to expand the child tax credit to $6,000 for new children and create a $50,000 tax deduction for start-up businesses.

Will this debate prove consequential, swing the “undecideds,” and spare us a MAGA restoration? Given what happened in 2016, I’m done with predictions. But I keep thinking about what she told Trump: “You’re not running against Joe Biden, you’re running against me.”

I bet he knows that now.

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Copyright 2024 Dick Polman, distributed exclusively by Cagle Cartoons newspaper syndicate.

Dick Polman, a veteran national political columnist based in Philadelphia and a Writer in Residence at the University of Pennsylvania, writes at DickPolman.net. Email him at [email protected]