They say you should dress for the job you want, not the job you have. I’m currently writing this in a very tight princess dress, which is making it quite difficult to type.

When I was little, I wanted to be a member of a royal family. My regular family was just a bit too regular for me.

We had a house with a fence that was supposed to keep animals inside the yard, and a dog that perpetually found his way out of it.

Back then, I thought that all royal homes were surrounded by fences, and also by guards who could ensure that Watson (my dog) would stay inside the yard.

Not by brandishing their weapons, but by brandishing steaks. Yep, I thought all royal dogs ate steak for breakfast, lunch, and dinner.

I wanted a palace. I wanted meals made of marshmallows (I thought all royal people ate sweets), and to be wildly, amazingly rich.

Now, of course, I am wildly, amazingly middle class. And I’m a computer programmer, which is a far cry from being a princess.

I wish I could say there was something royal in the power that a software engineer has. That with just a click of a mouse, they can make an entire website go down.

I did that once, and believe me, there was nothing royal about it. It was probably the most stressed I’ve ever been in my life, not counting the 9,282 other times I’ve been stressed in the last year.

There’s something in princesshood that appeals to every girl, even of the software engineering type. Princesses are beautiful, but not just because of makeup or dresses.

Princesses are beautiful because they’re kind. So kind that birds sing to them, and woodland creatures come to them to be petted.

Princesses are so kind that dogs (even mine) sit loyally by their side. Even if the princesses aren’t holding steaks.

I wanted to be that kind. But no matter how hard I tried, robins would never eat from my hand. My dog would, but he’d leave slobber all over my gown.

So I gave up on ever being or becoming royalty. And I threw myself into my job, where the most princess-like person was the saintly accountant who brought chocolate bars to the office.

I exchanged high heels for sneakers, a sweater for a flowing wrap, and leggings for stockings. It made it a lot easier to walk, work, and type. But it took away some magic.

If we can, we should try to bring that magic back.

If a way to a man’s heart is through his stomach, the way to a woman’s is through her nose.

Even a grown woman feels like a princess when she gets flowers as a gift. Especially when the flowers are scented.

And I assume men and puppies alike feel like princes when they are treated to a surprise ribeye.

So we should try to make each other feel like princes and princesses, or kings and queens. We can try being kind to one another.

Failing that, you can at least bring chocolate into your office. You’ll be treated like royalty for that.

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Copyright 2025 Alexandra Paskhaver, distributed exclusively by Cagle Cartoons newspaper syndicate.

Alexandra Paskhaver is a software engineer and writer. Both jobs require knowing where to stick semicolons, but she’s never quite; figured; it; out. For more information, check out her website at https://apaskhaver.github.io.